Here's one for the ladies
Showing my, sensitive side
Smooth
I like a hot girl who knows how to wind a waist
Especially the type that's giving me the time of day
Unless we get up in a private space
Greets me with a smiling face
I'll leave her feeling like a woman, like Shania Twain
Alright, okay, I got you thinking "what a dick"
I bet he's quite the opposite and comes across as a neurotic bitch
Lack in selfconfidence
Is it that obvious?
Well let's just say I praise the lord for alcoholic drinks
One night my game was on fire like it was herpes
Both the Fonz and John Travolta would have been like "we're not worthy!"
Despite having started early I wasn't slurring the words when I turned to a girl
Who was perfectly curvy, I didn't come off pervy
Flirty and riskay perhaps but she was taken aback
The times the selfdepricating act will get you crazy gash
We danced the bass we jacksson guzzle drinks until our brains were mash
She invited me back to her flat, I said lets take a cab
She said no it's only down the road so I said dope, we walked and talked I thought
I'd sorted until we were walking with some other bloke
Her cousin? No. Her brother? No. As far as introductions go this one was coming slow
A bit weird I thought but fuck it though
Once we lumped it home this man went straight in without no explaination
My expectations was that I caress her pale skin and privates in private with the
Lights dimmed
To my excitement things were moving along exactly to my liking
I was writing, she was riding it was beyond parental guidance, rated 18 and no other
Mean exessive violence
I was feeling like the Don putting my mac down until I heard a creeking in the background
"What the fuck was that sound?"
He had sneeked in and stripped down to a g-string and I would not agree to a threesome
With deviants it's just demeaning
I dont want a geezer beating his meat to me and a seniorita between the sheats those
Are not the ingredients of a decent evening
The rest of it's irrelevant, let's just say that my imparative was then just legging
It as if my life was threatened
Now I've met some odd people but those two just took the biscuit, what they did to
Me was twisted and it's just not cricket
See back in sixth form I was a chicken shit dork, all I wanted was a fit broad with
The morals of a pig whore
Theres one thing you can garner from this self indulged piss course it's that age
Old cliché "just be careful what you wish for"