I'll never be a wealthy man
But I'll make as much as I can
Spend the majority on rent and food
And I'll spend whatever's left on booze
No I'll never make a million pounds
Dragging up on common ground
Playing every song the same
Hoping that I'll get away with it
I'll never be an honest man
Lying, cheating all I can
Not a word of truth be spoke
I'm just another punchline-lacking joke
I'll never be a movie star
I've got no acting skill or natural charm
I've got no focus or no discipline
You'll never see me on the silver screen
But I'm a perfect example of how not to be
And I'm a perfectly imperfect version of a man like me
No I'll never be a famous guy
And it's obvious the reasons why
I'm not cool enough for skinny jeans
And if I was I wouldn't want to be
No I'll never get a record deal
Because I write songs about the way I feel
Not just??? in false platted shoes
Radio-friendly fake and autotuned
But I'm a perfect example of how not to be
And I'm a perfectly imperfect version of a man like me
I'll not amount to anything
And no one listens when I sing
I'll not amount to anything
I'll not amount to anything
And no one listens when I sing
I'll not amount to anything
I'll never be a man free from vice
Collected far too many in my time
No I'll not be sober as a charge
Because I like the taste of whiskey far too much
I've always found it tricky to say no
When certain things are waved under my nose
And I know it might be bad for me
But life is short so it might as well be sweet
And I'm a perfect example of how not to be
And I'm a perfectly imperfect version of a man
And a perfect example of how not to be
And I'm a perfectly imperfect version of a fucking idiot like me