From far beyond the galaxies I've journeyed to this place To study the behavior patterns of the human race And I find them highly illogical Girl meets boy they fall in love She says he's everything she's dreamed of But when they get married before he's aware She changes his habits the way he combs his hair She changes him to someone he's never been And then complains he's not like other men Now really I find this most illogical Take the case of your automobiles Greatest invention since man discovered wheels Hydromatic overdrive four-on-the-floor Pushbutton windows pushbutton doors Double barreled carborators rush you any place But you never can find a parking space Highly illogical Take the case of modern man He works all his life gives it all he can Saves all his money works overtime Pinches every penny banks every dime All he can think about is money but you know That he can't take it with him where he's going to go Now I find that fascinatingly illogical Now is the time to journey home to tell of what I've learned My people I believe have every right to be concerned For in spite of computers and advanced psychology Behavior patterns are still a mystery I predict the future of this earthly human race Is that having made a mess of Earth They'll move to outer space Well there goes the neighborhood Totally, completely, absolutely, irrevocably, highly illogical.