Meet the Little Man He greets you mighty quick I hear it's clear he's queer, my dear Be mindful of his tricks Shake his little hands Tickle on his feet He pukes and coughs when he gets off Then offers you a seat Oh poor you, so confused Victim to a keen coup Had no clue she'd debut A melody tonight From above I drop the rope Dangle it around your nose Jerk on my string and you'll hear me sing A song from the spire Silence! She sings C-A-P-T-I-V-A-TING So prude! No time for suitors Unsuitable men with less than chaste intent Often pursue her She doesn't mind at all, you see The men of the village at her feet The men of the village on their knees These men will not receive release Piqued, they claim, "But I'm replete Equipped with all things that you need You prig, you tease, I've no disease Please proceed with The Gentleman's Squeeze!" Oh poor you, so confused Victim to a keen coup Had no clue she'd debut A melody tonight From above I drop the rope Dangle it around your nose Jerk on my string and you'll hear me sing A song from the spire From above I drop the rope Dangle it around your nose Jerk on my string and you'll hear me sing A song from the spire Make no hobby of disquisition Nature is a tune but you just won't listen Erections on legs, bumbling up the hill Little Man, earn your keep! Dose me with the Paradise Pills! From above I drop the rope Dangle it around your nose Jerk on my string and you'll hear me sing A song from the spire From above I drop the rope Dangle it around your nose Jerk on my string and you'll hear me sing A song from the spire Oh poor you Oh poor you