Beer, beer ain't drinkin' Beer, beer ain't drinkin' I don't care what your mama's thinkin' Everbody knows that (beer ain't drinkin') Yeah well, it's the grog of the gods; Kickapoo joy juice I'm a queer for beer and as thirsty as a moose I don't care what your mama's thinkin' Everbody knows that (beer ain't drinkin') (yeah!) You say the bar's closed? Well, hell, son, just get me a beer What'd ya mean, "No way!" That shit's practically clear (let me tell ya) I don't care what your mama's thinkin' Everbody knows that (beer ain't drinkin') (I'm gonna tell you somethin' else here, now) Well, I don't want a draft, I don't want a Dry If I don't get a beer I'm gonna fuckin' die, I said... Beer, beer ain't drinkin' Beer, beer ain't drinkin' I don't care what your mama's thinkin' Everbody knows that (beer ain't drinkin') (Hey Mr. Piano Player! Whack-a-doo!) (And another thing:) Well, eatin' ain't cheatin',????????????? Everybody sing like they're at the camp meeting, I said... Beer, beer ain't drinkin' (Drinkin'! Drinkin'!) Beer, beer ain't drinkin' (Somebody get me a gin & tonic) I don't care what your mama's thinkin' Everbody knows that (beer ain't drinkin') (Ho!) Hell, I ain't drunk! I only had a pony keg I chugged my carbo-loadin' dinner, still got my hollow leg I don't care what your mama's thinkin' Everbody knows that (beer ain't drinkin') Yeah, everbody knows that (beer ain't drinkin') Everbody knows that (beer ain't drinkin') (Yeah!) (Huh!) (How!) (Bring me a beer, please)