We were all drinking at Marge's one night When an old cowboy came through the door He took a few shaky steps, then he started to moan And he keeled over right on the floor Doc came on over, took his stethoscope out He listened and he looked in his eyes He said, "Boys stick around, I just might need your help I'm afraid this will be a long night" 'Cause there's a five-gallon tear, a five-gallon tear Lodged in this poor boy's heart By the look in his eyes, he ain't cried in years And he's retaining a five-gallon tear Doc wrote a prescription to induce him to cry It was whiskey and sad country songs We propped him up in a booth And poured a drink down his throat Then we turned that old Wurlitzer on Well, he spluttered and he coughed And he hung down his head As those lonely songs worked on his heart When the memories started coming, six minutes apart We laid him face-up on the bar And then a five-gallon tear, a five-gallon tear Slowly welled up in his eyes We all yelled, "Push!" And we all gave a cheer When he cried that five-gallon tear ♪ That jar by the door don't hold pig feet no more The contents are sparkling clear That liquid within is not moonshine or gin It's a reminder to everyone here Yeah, it's a five-gallon tear, a five-gallon tear Let this be a lesson to you Keep your sorrow inside for too many years And you'll cry that five-gallon tear Buddy you'll cry You'll cry a five-gallon tear ♪ Yeah, a five-gallon tear, a five-gallon tear Let this be a lesson to you Keep your sorrow inside for too many years And you'll cry that five-gallon tear I said, a five-gallon tear, a five-gallon tear Let this be a lesson to you Keep your sorrow inside for too many years And you'll cry that five-gallon tear A five-gallon tear, a five-gallon tear Let this be a lesson to you Keep your sorrow inside for too many years And you'll cry that five-gallon tear