If I could I'd buy you a sofa**
If I was famous, I'd give you all my money and a signed poster
My love is like a lumberjack, big, burly, nothing like me, except he owns an ax
He eats flapjacks and daily smokes 3 packs, but lately his boss told him to relax
He said hang up the overalls go home and shave
He looked down at the soil and saw it in 2 ways
The place where plants grow and future home of his grave
Either way he respected and despised both
He never knew what love was but been divorced 3 times
Now solitude is asking "will you marry me? "
But like every relationship, he just can't and can't stop saw dusting cherry trees
Mammals cry, humans blush and berries bleed
Blood is juice our organs are decisions are seed
His life is a garden, our friends are greed, our friends are water, our friends are weeds
The governments a gardener
He pimps for profit and makes money off of shovels and hoes
His drugs are pesticides that kill the good and the bad
Either way the products tainted, the ax hits the ground covered in blood
Lumberjack love, the masterpiece is painted
It takes 40 whacks to take down a tree, it takes one word to take down me
I'm holding an ax in the forest of love, looking for a tree
She loves me too, but I'm always making up suspicions of her cheating on me
We get along but attachments a bulldozer and my blades left too many birds homeless
My ax is my only friend but when I'm not in Denver, I'm throwing up from the homesick
I love her, she's sharp, sturdy, not too wordy
But whenever she's not around, I miss her and start to worry
I'm no magician I never had enough magic to cut a tree hugger in half
So all I can do is admire their worthless passion, wait till they leave and laugh
I chop down homes and I'll chop down my own
I chop down happiness, I chop down nests
I chop down redwoods, I've chopped down the best
I chop down trees, I'm a lumberjack
I follow orders, if it was in my job description, I'd chop down me
A tree has no funeral and neither do relationships
Every night I see your lips and we kiss
Then I wake up alone with your fragrance still tasting it
I got good memories but I always think about the bad, taking my time and wasting it
It takes 40 whacks to take down a tree, except for this time it started to fall towards me
I threw her down and ran from the splintered tentacles
It took 39 that time but she came and gave me the 40th straight to my ventricles
It goes, chop down forest, make it a log
Turn it to paper, then send it to the nearest skyscraper
No 2 things ever seem to like each other, cause when one likes another
The other doesn't seem to want to be it's lover
It's okay, go along and find some other handsome man
I'd find someone I can use and someday put into my grandson's hand
The drops the palate and falls into the canvas, doesn't even know he fainted
The ax hits the ground covered in love
Lumberjack blood, the masterpiece is painted
We chop down the trees, I never gave her a ring, she never gave me a ring
So I guess it didn't mean a thing
Now we're both stumped, living out our trunks
Baby relax, put down your ax
I gotta go plant some trees, please wait for me, please
It takes 40 whacks to take down a tree, it takes one word to take down me
My ax took an ax and gave me 40 whacks
When she saw what she had done she gave me 41
It takes 40 whacks to take down a tree, it takes one word to take down me
By the time they saw dusk, all they saw was saw dust