Me and my brother were talking to each other About what makes a man, a man Was it brain or brawn or the month you were born? We just couldn't understand Our old man didn't like our appearance He said that only women wear long hair So me and my brother borrowed money from Mother We knew what we had to do We went downstairs, past the barber and gymnasium And got our arms tattooed Welcome to my life, tattoo I'm a man now, thanks to you I expect I'll regret you But the skin graft man won't get you You'll be there when I die Tattoo My dad beat me because mine said "Mother" But my mother naturally liked it and beat my brother 'Cause his tattoo was of a lady in the nude And my mother thought that was extremely rude Welcome to my life, tattoo We've a long time together, me and you I expect I'll regret you But the skin graft man won't get you You'll be there when I die Tattoo Now I'm older, I'm tattooed all over My wife is tattooed too A rooty-toot-toot, rooty-tooty-toot-toot Rooty-toot-toot tattoo too To you Radio London reminds you Go to the church of your choice