I wake up
But I don't feel to different
I'm thinking about my life
And what got me in this position
Wishing I can see the person I've been missing
But she's up in heaven now looking down from a distance
With the big man with the big plans
Still bogs my mind when I try to understand
What was his intentions why this decision
Leaving me alone and cold without my mom
I just don't get it
Ya but thats life I guess
I'm movin step by step
Hoping I can make you proud
Mom I'm doing the best I can
But I'm fallen
Ya I'm feeling exhausted
I'm stalling spending so much time reminiscing on nostalgia
God dammit I think I've lost it
My mind drifts away
Every time your picture goes and pops up in my conscience
It's constant
I wanna stop it
I just wanna think of the happy things
But my mind seems to do the opposite
It's impossible
I didn't believe it
When they called me in school
And told me that you were in the hospital
I'm sorry for
All the trouble that I've caused
I took your life for granted
And now that you're gone
I feel lost
And hopeless I don't know where I'm going
Cuz you were my guide
To help me in these helpless moments
You're my angel now
Ooo ooo
Cuz you're my angel now
Ooo ooo
You're my angel now
Ooo ooo
You're my angel now
Ya I catch myself staring out the window
Thinking of all that fucked up bullshit
That you and I had been thru
We got in a fight the last time I really saw you
Cuz I was sick of changing schools
Making new friends
Playing pretend
When will this end
Mom I don't know if I can keep doing this shit again
Step dad after step dad
They never gave a fuck
All they ever did was waste our time
And step on us
Look at all the pain they caused
Look at all the loved we lost
Look at all the dangerous changes and phases that they brought upon
We didn't need em
It was just you and that I believed in
But there was something there that I really wasn't seein
Cuz you were sick
And it couldn't be fixed
Marfan syndrom
What the fuck is that
Nah I dont wanna listen to this shit
I just wanna hide away and go playin with my friends
Ya thats the adolescence of a stupid ignorant kid
Just not knowing much
But he's growing up
You see you're the reason why I've turned into this person I've become ya
You were strong and you never gave up
You stayed positive and told me Nate go follow your love
And thats the biggest thing that makes me upset
Is you'll never be around
To watch me fuckin play my own set
And thats just a part of life that we have to accept
And what ever waits for us in the end we can never expect it
You're my angel now
Ooo ooo
Cuz you're my angel now
Ooo ooo
You're my angel now
Ooo ooo
You're my angel now
Days turn into months
Months turn into years
They didn't explain
My memories of you would disappear
I'm overwhelmed with anger
Cuz almost every time I look at your picture
Feels like I'm looking at a stranger
I fucking hate it
It drives me crazy
I keep talking to myself like
Get your shit together Nathan
Can't you see that you got the whole family worried
You haven't talked to them for months
How they gonna know that you're hurting
I just wanna say sorry I love you
My aunt and uncle
My three brothers Brandon Justin and Russle
My friends and cousins and my grandparents too
You always made us see heaven
When it was hell we walked thru
And trust me I'm trying my best thats for certain
Using my music to influence that person who needed purpose
Inspire those who feel nothing but discouraged
About following their dreams when they told you it wasn't worth it
Cuz I've been in that dark spot
From the ones I've lost
But I got myself out
Cuz I knew thats what she would want
To keep on fighting and trying to do your best
And become that figure that strives for more
And nothing less
Mom I love you and miss you
You taught me so much
But fuck theres still so much more that I coulda learned from you
But forever you'll be in my heart and memories
I'll have to do is look at the initials on my arm
K.G.C
You're my angel now
Ooo ooo
Cuz you're my angel now
Ooo ooo
You're my angel now
Ooo ooo
You're my angel now