I don't want to believe it, no I don't want to believe it I don't want to believe that Reese Witherspoon poops She's so pretty and she's so refined It can't be true that out of her behind Comes sticky, sticky poo It just can't be true That someone so sweet can create sticky poo But I consulted with my doctor and he told me If she's human, then she must go poop just about every day I started cryin' right there in the doctor's office Because Reese Witherspoon poops She's so pretty, she's so beautiful I can't believe it, I can't believe that she poops I've always believed that That poopin' was just somethin' done by ugly losers like me And that if you're a celebrity You don't have to waste your time sittin' on the toilet I don't want to believe it No, I don't want to believe it I don't want to believe that Reese Witherspoon poops No, I don't want to believe it I do not want to believe it I don't want to think about the fact That Reese Witherspoon poops