Ah, Velma
Things ain't the way they used to be
They sure ain't, Mama
They sure ain't
Whatever happened to fair dealing
And pure ethics
And nice manners?
Why is it everyone now
Is a pain in the ass?
Whatever happened to class? (Class)
Whatever happened to "Please, may I?"
And "Yes, thank you"
And "How charming"
Now every son of a bitch
Is a snake in the grass
Whatever happened to class?
Class
Oh, there ain't no gentlemen to open up the doors
There ain't no ladies now
There's only pigs and whores
And even kids'll knock you down so's they can pass
Nobody's got no class
Whatever happened to old values?
And fine morals?
And good breeding?
Now no one even says "Oops"
When they're passing their gas!
Whatever happened to class?
Class
Oh, there ain't no gentlemen who's fit for any use
And any girl'll touch your privates for a deuce
And even kids'll kick your shins and give you sass (and even kids'll kick your shins and give you sass)
Nobody's got no class
All you read about today is rape and theft
Jesus Christ!
Ain't there no decency left?
Nobody's got no class
Everybody you watch
'S got his brains in his crotch
Holy crap (holy crap)
What a shame (what a shame)
What became of class?