Sitting on throne shaped porcelain. Bum plumbing numb, I'm waiting
(This is how we poop)
More pushing, back aches, pulled my groin, still stuck, held breath, started straining
Taking so long on the John, battery on my phone is draining (This is how we poop)
Ya smell this, ya smell that, light a match or the world gets a fumigating
(Knock knock knock) Hurry up I'm waiting!
Be quiet! I'm concentrating!
How long you estimating?
Don't know it's not evacuating!
This is how we poop, yeah, constipated
Ate something and I'm glued to the can
This is how we poop, doo-doo doo-doo. This is how we poop
This is how we poo, yeah spilling ex-lax
Drank some to help my gluteus blast
This is how we poop, doo-doo doo-doo. This is how we poop.
Big poops and a few chicks don't mix, dropping oxide at a party
Had to guard those cheeks cuz my pooper reeks of having tacos and profound sharting (Ohhhh!!!)
Now I'm walking to the potty leaving a fragrance from my crop dusting (This is how we poop)
My stinking's at a climax, duck and sneak past cuz I kinda soiled my clothing
Turn on the sink
'Washing his hands' they'll think!
Toilet paper on the seat
Flushing with my feet!
This is how we poop, yeah party pooping
Hate dumping out a deuce in public
This is how we poop, doo-doo doo-doo. This is how we poop
This is how we poop, yeah, gotta take snaps
This stunning craps the hugest I've had
This is how we poop, doo-doo doo-doo, this is how we poop
This one goes out to the ladies, pretending ... you're going to fix your makeup ... uh huh, I believe you
Yo, this goes out to all you kids at the gym doing your squats ... in the washroom. Smells like you just lost 10 lbs.
Yo, shootout to all you guys in stalls next to me who curtesy flush - respect!
This is how we poop, yeah, really hate that
Disgusting water splashing my crack
This is how we poop, doo-doo doo-doo, this is how we poop
This is how we poop, yeah, built a waste dam
Eighth flush and yet the dookie won't scram
This is how we poop, doo-doo doo-doo. This is how we poop
This goes out to all you dudes sitting down to number 1 in case you number 2.
Ah ha, not me.
This is how we poop, yeah, losing patience
Hey, plunger rendezvous with that mess
This is how we poop,
Flush? wait, no, no, no, no, put the seat back
Let's wipe.