They will clean up all your talking in a manner such as this They will make you take a tinkle when you wanna take a piss And they'll make you call fellatio a trouser-friendly kiss Here's the plain situation, there's no negotiation With the fellas at the freakin' FCC They're as stuffy as the stuffiest of special interest groups Make a joke about your bowels and they order in the troops Any baby with a brain could tell them everybody poops Take a tip, take a lesson, you'll never win by messing With the fellas at the freakin' FCC And if you find yourself with some young sexy thing You're gonna have to do her with your ding-a-ling 'Cause you can't say penis So they sent this little warning, they're prepared to do their worst And they stuck it in your mailbox, hoping you could be coerced I can think of quite another place they should have stuck it first They may just be neurotic, or possibly psychotic They're the fellas at the freakin' FCC