At a loss for how to get through today Close it all out Keep all thought, the onslaught at bay You'll be your old self in a month, again you say But that's 31 fucking days away Between jobs and I'm on beechwood By the park Dealing with the sudden shift in your emotional capacity I thank god I've got this downtime to really, Fabricate, And then just wallow with this pit in my chest I tried to call you A bit after 8 When I knew you were home Left a smile that was fraud, and I want to know basically everything Even the drowning Only heard your machine I tried to call you But you're never around Are you ok? Are you gone for good? I tried to call you But I'm not Sure I'll find a spot north of Ritner again The only The only thing I want to feel The only thing I want to know is How loud these speakers will go