One day while I was eating down at Smokey Joe's cafe A-sittin' there readin' down at Smokey Joe's cafe A chicken walked in through the door That I had never seen before At least I never saw her down at Smokey Joe's cafe And it scared me when she sat right down next to me Her knees were almost touching mine at Smokey Joe's cafe A chill was runnin' down my spine at Smokey Joe's cafe I could smell her sweet perfume She smiled and made my heart go boom And everybody room at Smokey Joe's cafe They said "be careful - that chick belongs to Smokey Joe" And from behind the counter - I saw a man A chef's hat on his head and a knife in his hand He grabbed me by the collar and began to shout "You better eat up all your beans, boy and clear right on out!" Well, I know I'll never eat again at Smokey Joe's cafe And so I'll never see again at Smokey Joe's cafe I'd rather eat my chili beans at Jim's or Jack's or John's or Gene's Than take my chances eating down at Smokey Joe's cafe I risked my life when that Smokey Joe's a crazy fool