Got a borderline brain just a chronic concussion!
So whats your problem dear? my problem? pfft nothing!
How bout with life in itself can ya fix that? hey listen
Dya have something along the lines of personality fixing?
Hows your head? well I've only had complaints!
I went home from the doctor with a note on my brain
Saying: here lies the problem you were trying to find
Should've known the source was in me
When my mouth always tastes like bile
Got shitfuck immune system sick as a dog
Im bored outta my mind coughing yellow snot up
The psychiatrist talked to me like i was dumb
It was hard not to get up and scream from the top of my lungs
Yeah my brains not the best it has several pests
Sewer rats scour thru it tryna find trash to ingest
Yet im doing what i can with it I've always done that
I dont need pity i am fine i am
Ok with everything being fucked up with me having shit luck
Already knew that much but hey why not just pile it on
Im like hardwood im infested with my childhood home
Im like broken bottles bestest when thrown out of control
Im like home before the sundown but sundown never stops
Especially when you're abused at home while growing up
Im like just sneak out in the morning and hope they dont wake up
Im like why are you so thirsty? why are you so rough?
Even in the nights where i was sure i would die i never prayed
Instead i clasped my fingers tight
And told god if he ever showed his face i would show him
The true meaning behind the sin of wrath
I got borderline anger i am barely holding back
And god its been festering for years and i am still pissed at you
I already got a shitty dad i dont need two
I got a borderline brain with some extra spicy spices
With depression and avoidant sprinkled over it like lice
I have ocd that follows me around at every turn
I got a list that is too long for them to print it on my urn
Like here lies blood girl: cause of death unknown
But even when im dead someone will try to have my cover blown
And share my lifestory that was never meant for them
Share my saddest secrets with their friends colleagues friend's wife
Cause im just a wet specimen sitting on the shelf
Gods favourite part time play is making people mentally ill
Thats why i just dance around the saddest clown he got
He snaps his fingers suddenly ill cry and wanna cut
Borderline is scary i got mood swings for days
Anger that i hate feelings that feel fake
I am worried im lying to myself even when
I am clearly so sick that i couldn't even tell
And even in the nights where i was sure
Id commit suicide i never prayed
Instead i clasped my fingers tight and told myself
To never go that way and to show them
The true meaning behind changing ways
I got years of being my own therapist i should get payed
And i will keep bettering myself until im better than the rest!
And i can do that even with my brain full of pests!