Let me set the scene
10 years old, 6 months pregnant
With a jheri curl that's lime green
Mom says I'm not fat
She also says I'm not sad
So I'm not sure what worth her word had
My counselor says I'll make friends real soon
But I'm too white for the black kids
And too black to be a token coon
Another school where I don't fit in
Another year waiting for summer
So I can trail behind my Brother and his friends
But I don't think they like me either
Did I do something wrong?
Am I broken, am I an alien?
I don't think there's anywhere I belong
I don't talk enough because I think too much
If I was white would it be this rough?
This can't be growing up
6th grade, won't spend another year feeling alone
Joined the band to play drums but they put me on the fucking trombone
This year I'm being approachable, friendly, but stern
Do other kids like Rocky Horror and Dragon Riders of Pern??
Will other black kids like me someday
My white friends say the N word more than me
And it's okay because they're blacker than me
A few months later I invited them to my birthday
And they said yes!
Spent the rest of the week grinning, nothing could stop me
But none of them showed - I haven't celebrated a birthday since
Did I do something wrong?
Am I broken, am I an alien?
Will I ever find where I belong?
I don't talk enough because I think too much
If I was white would making friends be this tough?
This can't be growing up
I can't lie for a while it really fucked me up
Too young to get it I just got that I wasn't enough
For the longest time I thought that maybe it's just my luck
No portraits and my forehead would never be kissed
Or made important, fuck
'Cause when you're different they'll gladly treat you badly
They say you'll end up snatching xannies,
Mashing patties, hair all nappy
Smashing Nattys outside the party
'Cause no one would give up the addy
Hella trashy on TV screaming: "Maury, I am not the daddy!"
Now I know that believing it was one my worst habits
Now I'm true to myself regardless of social status
I'm not afraid to be me, I could sneak into the Met Gala
In the loudest suit and walk out with Zoe and Lenny Kravitz
I used to be in constant crisis about who I was
Now I know it takes time to learn self love
To look in the mirror and say: "I will always be enough"
Because I am, I am
Believe me, I am
I am strong enough, I am smart enough
I am likable, I will forge my own path from now on
I am kind enough, I am beautiful
I will live as such, I can go anywhere and belong
Ooh-whoah-ah, ooh-whoah-ah, ooh-whoah-ah
Ooh-whoah-ah, ooh-whoah-ah, ooh-whoah-ah