Midtown mama, she's so uptight
She's so uptight, she's so uptight
All tucked away on her ivory shelf
She's easy on the eyes but she's hard on herself
Ya gotta get down loose with your boy
Rapzunzel let down your shorts
Tell ya mama, tell ya papa
And all the church ladies sing
In the Gardens of Gomorrah
You can do anything you want to
No one's creepin'
No one's peepin'
No one's narcin'
No looky-loos
You can dump a Slurpee down your bra when you dance
You can jam a cheese fry down the back of your pants
You can take a load off, you can take off your jeans
Sit bare ass naked on a plate of poutine
Jet down to the border, that's the plan
Cut an album on a farm? "YES PECAN"
Every weekend I'm with The Weeknd
I strip for tips on the Sunset strip
In the Gardens of Gomorrah
You can be anything you wanna be
Be a pervert
Be a sicko
Be a jagoff
A fuckin' sleaze
Now you're back at home but it's not the same
Still got the T Man runnin' through your brain
I showed you my world, I showed you my ass
You're not going back to that grad school class
You realize Gomorrah was more than a place
"Does it live in my heart?" Not the case
It rests in one dude. Now who could that be?
The motherfucking one time Emmy nominee
You gotta spread the word cuz it'll ruin their week
To see a such fit bird with a big fat Greek
"We sent you to college! We spent all that money!"
"But mom! But dad his podcast's funny!
He's got all these cool Tabasco shirts
His Bud Dry hat made me squirt my skirt
I shake and quiver when his hand's on my butt
He said he'd introduce me to Hanny and Dutts
When I see him I'm drenched
When he sings I just ooze
I gush at the touch of this here chubby dude
Niagara, the Nile, the Adriatic Sea
That's what I'm like on his T-Bird seat"
Your dad's all mad but you know he's just jealous
He'll never land a man who's played Coachella
Meanwhile your mom's turned me into a simp
Who you think gave you those two sweater blimps?
Your neck, your back, your pussy, your crack
I won't be texting any one of them back
Cuz I'm moving on to the next city
"But Timmy I love you"
Yeah well life's shitty
Mama papa baby mama papa motherfucker
Mama papa baby mama papa sister brother
Tell your pappy, tell your nieces and your nephew
Tell your doctor, tell fucking Cousin Greg too
In the Gardens of Gomorrah
You can meet anyone you wanna meet
Meet the Kat Man
Meet K Kalpy
The Muddafuckah
The Greek Physique
Anything I wanna do
Anything I wanna do
Anything I wanna do
Anything I wanna do
Oh Jehova
Mary, Joseph
Vishnu, Allah
Holy Moses
Crinkle, curly
Wedge or waffle
Steak or shoestring
Battered, loaded