Well now Bubba and the boys at the uptown bar They got a little too drunk went a little too far They were out four wheeling round town till the crack of dawn And then the sheriff came and threw them in the calaboose And he said he wasn't gonna turn them loose Just somebody paid for the damage to the courthouse lawn Well he got paid Friday and it ain't no joke He woke up this morning hungover and broke He's been out all night and he's afraid to face his wife His clothes are dirty and his eyes are red He's got a great big knot on the side of his head Oh the joys of living the honky tonk life Well you honky tonk women and you honky tonk men Honky tonk life's gonna do you in Ain't nothin' cool about sittin' on a bar stool higher than a Chinese kite You're just a pop top poppa with a one track mind You're gonna pass out before it's closin' time Just another darn fool drowning in the neon lights every night I said oh the joys of living the honky tonk life Ole Johnny was a happily married man Till he started hanging out at the Dew Drop Inn Met a peroxide floozie by the name of Sally Ann Then almost every morning he was late for work Then his wife found some lipstick stain on his shirt And that's about the time that the stuff started hittin' the fan And then the next thing he knew he was asittin' in court About some alimony and some child support And he lost his driver's license for a DWI And now his clothes are ragged and he don't look well He's living downtown in a cheap hotel On the joys of living the honky tonk life Well you honky tonk women and you honky tonk men...