I need to tell you something, I'm not as sad as I used to be
Depression holes up in my lungs some days but
I've been exhaling it into the fresh midwinter breeze
You have to to dig to find purpose
I am breaking that ground anywhere I can
If I exhaust all my resources you will find me alone
Silent and buried in sand
Some days I will be this quiet and
Others will not understand it
If you aren't willing to change
The most you will achieve is comfort and mediocrity
When I watched someone I love lose consciousness for the last time
I understood why that wasn't enough for me
It wasn't enough for me
I want to show you something
It's a feeling that my words cannot explain
It's the blunt force trauma to my heart when
I hear the phrase "you give and take away"
You have to fight to earn progress
I will push back on the doors that have kept me out
If I get to the gatekeeper and he won't let me in
Does that mean I haven't earned my doubt?
There is no way to rationalize
Having to see this much loss of life
If you aren't willing to change
The most you will achieve is comfort and mediocrity
When I watched someone I love lose consciousness for the last time
I understood why that wasn't enough for me
Where my heart lies hasn't changed
But who it lies with seems to dwindle with every year
When daily actions decide rest or torment
I understand why you've edited the god you fear
We've all edited the god we fear
When we sat with her in silent rooms
I never knew how much those moments meant
I read a book and took her for granted
Never noticing each time she slipped
When father said we wouldn't visit much longer
I never knew exactly what he meant
Our beliefs were based on loved ones dying
Why was I surprised that this felt different
I was in the room when she shut her eyes
I made a sketch of a demon slayer
I escaped in passive pencil drawings
While they issued her an afterlife prayer
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I hoped she'd live to see me find my real love
It was clear she didn't want to wait
I escaped in passive pencil drawings
While she passed through eternity's gates