It's cold as fuck outside My windows frozen tight Not going out tonight Warm by the fireside My stockings' full of coal It burns and warms my soul I'm feelin' wonderful Bundled up from the cold Prying out the antlers from my grill Pray that Santa can forgive, but I don't think he ever will Not one for Christmas spirit And I don't wanna hear it My skin hurts all the time, and I'm sick every day This weather's unforgiving, and I don't feel like giving Starbucks a ten to hear the latest hits from Buble Oh, everyday, I hear them say The holiday is on it's way Oh everyday, to my dismay It's cold and gray, and I'm locked away Cause it's cold as fuck outside (Fuck December)