Dear Diary I died again today A clumsy joke It was just a joke The silence hung Heavy as a smoking gun Excuse me while I scream into this bin I guess I went too far Walk to the reservoir Gaze into the abyss And eat my bag of crisps It's hard to live with yourself It's hard to live with yourself Dear Diary Every day You've got to talk with somebody Somebody you'd really rather not I gasp for breath A slow and painful death Actually, I might just take the stairs It came out wrong again See my cheeks burn with shame A comment so inept Frank Spencer would have wept It's hard to live with yourself It's hard to live with yourself Dear Diary I died again today I died again today