Where were you two years ago When I was locked out there at the barn When some certain Athens sacred monster Was doing me in the charm We could've been chatting heart to heart On that front porch with a view Where were you, girl, when I needed you? Where were you two weeks ago A week again after your promise I was in your place of employment Crying in my hummus Somebody in there said, "Boy you're lookin' bad" And I said, "You know that is nothin' new" Where were you, girl, when I needed you? Were you in that second story well-lighted place Up against its occupant artist in his personal space I know that has been known to happen But I thought all of that was through Where were you, girl, when I needed you? Where were you last Monday When I was overwrought I was watching the bright bug lamp flicker You were doing up the dim, dim 40 Watt I was alone with Pepe Lopez I just couldn't do the schmooze Where were you, girl, when I needed you? Where are you this Sunday I'm in shaky health I am in the back yard leaking On the spot where you proclaimed yourself You are hungry, wanting breakfast And my heart is in a stew Where were you, girl, when I needed you? Where were you, girl, when I needed you?