The door opened In walked my brother terrified Teary eyed I'm wide open Only to hear our father died It's not true I'm hopin' I need some air, I'm chokin' Get me off this ride. Where's life goin'? Feelin' I'm lost, I'm frozen. Suspended in mid-traumatized state Why I'm chosen for this fate I don't know Head shakes back and forth Emotion oh insociable not speakin Remain in silence 'cause I'm weak And deep inside I'm freakin' Want my father back I need him. Why's god cheatin' Takin' half the two that gave me life My mind replays the thought Now no longer can I sleep at night Not feelin' right Insecure Now what's my future lookin' like Aint' delt with death before Age eleven and can't take no more My hands on the floor 'Cause my stomach's feelin' sick And I was mad at the lord Because he took him all to quick That day On his way to pick me up He never made it Blamed it all on myself And I dwelled in self-hatred On a path called destruct Many thought I wouldn't make it I hated the way I feel But I just can't seem to shake it Somebody take it away This mad situation My world is breakin' And I feel I'm 'bout to cave in I tried to take it all in After it all settled I couldn't begin Accepting you were gone But understood I tried to take it all in After it all settled I couldn't begin Accepting you were gone But understood Hey Dad I miss you For everyday gone And for the rest of my life Tried to remain strong Until we reunite Live on your memory From the seeds You planted gently Thanks for bein' there for me And all the time you spent with me Love sent for me If I could only have that day back To sit down and rap Shoot the breeze and have a chat But the fact still remains still later On the day I have to meet our maker I write my feelings on the paper For now Along the golf course where you once played I see you As I drive by I feel you Like your presence is there I stop and I stare I see the pictures of days we shared Well aware that you cared Making sure I was prepared for life The hardships, the struggles, The garbage, and the troubles that come with it Always kept my head with it I gripped it Close to my heart Everything you tought me My dad, my hero You had my love for all eternity I tried to take it all in After it all settled I couldn't begin Accepting you were gone But understood I tried to take it all in After it all settled I couldn't begin Accepting you were gone But understood I tried to take it all in After it all settled I couldn't begin Accepting you were gone But understood I tried to take it all in After it all settled I couldn't begin Accepting you were gone But understood