I open the door
To a room of treasure chests
Shadows creeping in the corners
It looks like a vampire's nest
Blood dripping from the ceiling
Now I see some bat wings
I unsheathe my stake and dagger
But I am met with maniacal laughter
We're just here to play
Just to play a game
We're just here to play
Just to play a game
Put your weapons away you fool
You think you look so cool
We're just here to sling some cards
Now will you be our bard?
But I'm a vampire slayer
Not some card player
We'll teach you how to play
To play our game
We'll teach you how to play
Then you'll be our friend
I'll teach you the rules
Then you can have your precious jewels
Just watch
A quick demonstration
Let's roll some dice
Shuffle deck nice
Cut it in half
Now draw 7 cards please
You'll go last
Think carefully about your turn
Now don't play too fast
You summon a creature
Now you'll pass
We tutor vampirically
And dredge up some bats
We drain you with lifelink
With a big fang attack
We won the game
Hope you had a blast