Well, how do you keep a moron In wighat suspense? I'll tell you that later, But first I'll tell you this... Ah, hoo! (Screaming) Hoo! Well now Willy tore his hair out And Sally grew a beard Vince went apeshit And cut off his ears Ruby went to town Completely upside down Sally spilled some powder And had a tantrum in her gown She went hoo! (Screaming) Hoo! Well my mama had twin babies On one sweet summer day She beat one in the head And I'm the one that got away Protected by my wighat And my Frederick's snakeskin pants I rode my horse to Hollywood And did a wondrous dance I went hoo! (Screaming) Hoo! Well my granny jumpin' catfish Do the limbo on my face But no one seems to notice When my wighat is in place My wighat lifts me higher Than I've ever been before You can go and buy yours At all better wighat stores Just ask for hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Yeah, they wear them in Exotica When they get the blues They voted them the best When worn with matching shoes It's the call of the wighat That brought you to this place It's just a big, fat, Hairy fashion race Yeah, hoo! (Screaming) Hoo! Well, I trained a dinosaur For the prehistoric stage But the discovery of the wighat Is what made me the rage Now some things come, And some things have gone, But wighats are forever Yeah, they just go on and on And on and hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! But I can still hear Mama callin', "Junior! Git home! What's got into you? What's that on your dome?" It's the call of the wighat It's the modern age taboo For they forever separate The old from the new Yeah, hoo! (Trilling) Hoo! Bye bye! Bye bye, wighat! Bye bye, wighat! Bye bye, you big fat...