You shoulda made me a drunkard Shoulda made me a liar Made me a preacher With a head full of fire You coulda made me a gambler Coulda made me a thief Made me a salesman Pockets full of receipts But I chose water over wine Jars of formaldehyde Think of all the things I missed Why'd you make me a scientist Is this the best you've got I'm not impressed Anything you can do I'll equate and project I chose water over wine Jars of formaldehyde Think of everything I missed Why'd you make me a scientist