I said goodbye at least 200 times Before I came here I know it's different on the other side But we've been here before From car rides in silence To the nights when we wrapped up in a trance It feels so different when I'm just holding your hand You know so little about it And times I just wanted to go Surely they could go without it Hearing me in this state so cold And going back just feels so old 200 Times I felt myself slip in The haze of fairy lights Block out my closest world The outside is just out of the question Rush to the head, the beautiful nothing I want to surround myself in The truest of myself's here So I hope they'd listen in I know so little about it And times I just needed to leave Brink of tears and blurting out "I need something desperately Surely it's just not me"