Callin' this an ode
That would be a stretch
And I won't write an ode
For a thing that
Still isn't over yet
Go
Woulda lost a bet
Will our lives be at all like we thought
Were dreams all an overstep
Old
The older that I get
The thoughts of where we would be now
Are looking like jokes at best
The thing
That I would not predict
Is how grateful I'd be to just breathe
And walk around no longer sick
Grateful for such normal things
Like waking up not full of dread
Unable to get out of bed
Grateful for such boring things
Like driving around a sharp bend
Not wanting go straight ahead
Grateful for such normal things
Like sitting alone with thoughts
And not having to fight them off
Could that be the normal now?
Managing what can't be cured
Was born with me when I was born
Is it really smart
Does it make any sense
Be beholden to the hopes that we had
While looking through a child's lense
Back I knew it all
But it turns out a turn for the worse
Was waiting just outside the hall
Scars
Dug tunnels in the brain
With the knowledge that there will be new ones
Made through my remaining days
Yeah
I guess that is to say
That no matter how hard that I try
I'll end up back in hell sometimes
Grateful for the time I spend
Every second of normal
Is like a blessing that heaven has sent
Changed the way I look at things
After thinking of death as a friend
I see things through a different lense
Who could know what life would bring
So I'm trying to keep it the same
And always take it day by day
One small step and test the ground
If it's solid I'll put down a stake
And keep on building up the house
Everyone needs
A reason to be
Especially those
Who can't seem to see
The point of it all
Where's the green on the grass?
What's the meaning of life?
What's so bad about death?
I couldn't find
One clear reason to live
But that means I'm free
To fill that space in
No purpose to get
Means a purpose to learn
You can go out and find one
While you wait for your turn
Maybe life is a canvas so
And I can just paint my own world