Long ago in days of old There lived a knight who Wasn't quite as bold As a knight should be He rode an old grey mare called Bess Searchin' for a damsel in distress Just to see if he Could set her free See the knight in rusty armour ride To her aid Trusty sword is hanging at his side With a rusty blade Up the tower steps he sneaked But as he moved His rusty armour squeaked Such a mournful note And all the sentries at their posts Thought it must have been the castle ghost They jumped for their lives In the moat So the knight in rusty armour won His fair maid Had no need to draw his trusty sword With a rusty blade As he bent to kiss his bride He found that he was Rusted up inside In his battle dress And I can't guess How they still got married and had twins They came in tins Every suit of armour ever made Has a kink Chainmail pants with a missing link