Lately I've been a walking bender
A Jameson & pickleback late night week ender
A shutting down the dive bar hundred-dollar spender
Then crying bout my bank account on Monday
I'm a Sunday afternoon hangover "not drinking againer"
But I just tell myself that mama didn't raise a quitter
If I'm looking for attention, you can find me in the center
Does anybody else relate?
Are you a "lets have another" justifier
Or a round for all your buddies provider?
Are you a lap around the bar at the end of the night?
An after party host at closing time?
If you checked yes, then let's be friends
We'll keep it going till 6AM
But if you're here for one or two – time to rethink
Cause there ain't nothing casual about the way I drink
I'm a beer out on a boat appreciator
A drinking game rule book negotiator
I'll get a bunch of strangers going crazy at a kegger
While singing every word to Afroman
I may not be the most amazing chugger
But I'll shoot whiskey one after the other
You can be a doctor, or a lawyer, or a cop that's undercover
But tonight were in the same gang
Are you a "lets have another" justifier
Or a round for all your buddies provider?
Are you a lap around the bar at the end of the night?
An after party host at closing time?
If you checked yes, then let's be friends
We'll keep it going till 6AM
But if you're here for one or two – time to rethink
Cause there ain't nothing casual about the way I drink
There ain't no doubt
I should slow down
But my fear of missing out
Don't go well with this condition
Maybe it's true & you don't need booze to have a real good time
But life is always better with a solo cup raised high
Are you a "lets have another" justifier
Or a round for all your buddies provider?
Are you a lap around the bar at the end of the night?
An after party host at closing time?
If you checked yes, then let's be friends
We'll keep it going till 6AM
But if you're here for one or two – time to rethink
Cause there ain't nothing casual about the way I drink
About the way I drink