Here's a story of an honest man losing religion Climbing the pulpit steps before an eager congregation While praying came a wicked inspiration Brothers, sisters, this is what he said Dearly beloved [Make no mistake], Dearly beloved [despite our Traits], dearly beloved I can't relate to you I can't relate to you He was the kind of guy who'd always go right out of his way But more before the crazy notion leapt right into his head And stubbornly crept into every mad perception I can't deny a funny feeling when he said Dearly beloved [Make no mistake], Dearly beloved [despite our Traits], dearly beloved I can't relate to you I can't relate to you Dearest in memoriam, set phasers to stun And grab yourself a neighbor's skeleton to lean upon Did you know him in life, one filled with regret? So soon we all forget we ever met Do you know my name? Sing a light refrain For a man estranged I won't deny that I'm inclined to isolate Dearly beloved, dearly beloved, dearly beloved I can't believe I can't relate to you, I can't relate to you I can't relate to you, I can't relate to you