(*Boland) It all started* When we were just kids I don't remember But Im sure that it did Why is my left on my left My right on my right I'm sure theres a monster In my closet tonight There are things I can't figure What are they for Like nicotine, Nintendo or nuclear war Theyre there to addict us Maintain or scare County state and world Only three kinds of fair [Chorus:] Jesus and Ruger They're both straight shooters Islam and Napalm Mean something to someone My chakras are blocked But I'm learning tai chi So pitch what youre selling And leave me be Cause I'm just fine by me My bank needs a roll And so does my rock I go down to the river Out here when it's hot Down by the waters I'll cool off my heels Solve the worlds problems With a rod and reel Tonight I can't sleep That's the reason for this song The church bell outside Done hit the third gong I'm just a weary traveler No bags in my hand Right where I sit Is where I'll make a stand [Repeat Chorus:]