The thing about writing a book is
You just never know where to begin
Doing everything for the success
All just ends up being a regret
Trynna figure out what my truth is
Questioning myself should I do this
Putting everything in the music
Overthinking makes me wanna lose it
I look the mirror, then I start to tear up
Judging my appearance, never had a parent
They say try to cheer up, I don't wanna hear it
Ain't nobody caring, they never seen the terrors
Blood on the floors, cops at the door
Parents weren't married, but they were divorced
Yell and scream a lot, fighting like a war
Mom sorta stayed, dad was out the door
The sad part is that it's happening now
Me and my BM going shout for shout
I think about the past like damn what now
Looking at my daughter like damn you proud
She ain't even part of it, she'll remember all of it
And the crazy part of it, I'm the one who started it
Trynna break the chain, but I'm held by restraints
I give it all I got but nothing ever changed
I lost a few people who were close to me
A very good friend that's supposed to be
By my side till we die but unfortunately
You left quick makes me sick and it tortures me
You were like my damn brother, and I lost my grandmother
And you even knew each other, when I heard the news of him
Man I just fell to the floor
Pain that I'm feeling is like I lost the war
Yea, what am I supposed to do
Everyone is dying, and I'm crying, it's a sign
Your losing everyone that was close to you
I thought I paid the price but I'm overdue
I keep getting thrown to pit of fire
Got a bunch of burns but I'm feeling fine
What I tell everyone but it is a lie
How I look on the out is not same inside
Growing up all I ever wanted was a friend
One that would stick it out with me to the end
But that didn't happen I was lonely as a kid
With no one around it's like they don't give a shit
The people who I trust did me dirty
Thinking it would change would just hurt me
Prolly won't be happy till I'm thirty but
Not the destination it's the journey
Yea, losing my Abuela man that shit got me fed up
It brings me to the ground and I don't wanna get up
Voices in my head that just can't shut the hell up
She watched over me, cause she wanted better
She loved me like her own, she wanted me to grow
Times when she called should've picked up the phone
It's too late for that no one's fault but my own
One chapter down there's many more to go
Let's talk about how no girl ever wants you
Maybe cause you're short and I know that it haunts you
A couple inches more would've changed all of it
Let's just ask God why didn't I think of this
But wait there's more, not only are you short
Got so many zits that you start to look deformed
Maybe an exaggeration but you get the point
No girl ever wants to see that in the morn'
Every girl that you spoke with thinks your creep
Maybe cause you get attached the moment that you meet
And start sounding like a weirdo from the moment that you speak
You'll never get a 10 when you acting like a geek
You try to spoil them and act like a gentlemen
They'll look at you as weak and try to find a better man
Cause realistically these women want thugs
Get treated like shit, and get told there a slut
When a good man comes you just laugh and you shrug
Then post you need a good guy, with boys that your done
I sit there so confused man I swear that shit is dumb
How you want what's real but get the fakest love
I'm not in the right but I'm not in the wrong
I'm not the only guy who's relating to this song
Shit, some girls are prolly feeling what I'm saying
So what the hell is wrong with people driving me insane
I could sit all day just drowning in my pity
Blaming everyone and blame it on my city
Talk about the people how dirty that did me
None of it will change, but I'm hoping that you get me
It's hard to find words when it comes to this topic
Hide all my pain in a box and I lock it
But the people need me, so I'm making you a promise
I'll be the hero for you when I drop Forsaken Prophet