Trying to understand why I'm here Keep it to myself 'cause I'm too scared Finally I can go, I won't say goodbye It's my choice 'cause you know that I tried Silver love in my drink It's so hard, I try so hard to change I try to be okay, I tried afterlife All this pain will once subside All my pain will last in the end I wanna change, so hard to change I hid my soul, it's just hard to change Will you save my life? I'll die on my own Trying to understand why I'm here Keep it to myself 'cause I'm too scared Finally I can go, I won't say goodbye It's my choice 'cause you know that I tried I'm sitting here with all the ghosts in my hallway Thinking about the better days when all the problems fade away Fifty mil' that's all I want and I'ma go away Goin' somewhere far away, spending all my better days I see the you in me and that shouldn't be possible Run into some obstacles and turn it into particles Lil' angel shawty, she done played me like a cardinal Dove right in my armory and stole right out my arsenal You're playing with my head, you won't get away with that I like to do what I want, if you're okay with that I'm on a short leash, upside down just like a bat My people watching, they plotting my aftermath I'm feeling trapped in like I've got claustrophobia Endless mazes, I'm trapped in my utopia Looking for a fix I bought straight from Cambodia Being left on seen is like my worst phobia