Well The Poopsmith, he could talk (Hello) And Marzipan would rock And The Stick would be this big ol' tree That would try to eat everyone Expect The Cheat and me (AND ME!) We'll see! And the King Of Town would be underground In a box filled up with peas (I hate peas!) I know! Bubs would give away flamethrowers That shoot chocolate hundred dollars bills (Imitation chocolate!) And my stupid baby brother Would've been born with horns and a tail (I'm evil.) And Coach Z would wear this cool jacket (Check it out, yo!) And Homestar just couldn't hack it (I quit!) And Pom-Pom wouldn't change at all Expect he would look like an ABA basketball (Two, three, four) And this little weirdo, would be a modestly hot girl To help me through the hard times You know the kind that are only sorta hot So they don't mess around with other guys