You better watch out, You're probably gonna cry, You're probably gonna pout, I'm telling you why, cause Santa Claus ain't coming to your town He dosen't have a list, He never checks it twice, He dosen't give a shit if you're naughty or nice, cause Santa Claus ain't coming to your town He sees you when you're sleeping, He knows when you're awake He watches you as you touch yourself, So go on just master... You better watch out, You're probably gonna cry, You're probably gonna pout, I'm telling you why, cause Santa Claus ain't coming to your town Cause Santa Claus ain't coming to your town Here comes Santa Claus Here comes Santa Claus Ready to cause you pain Ready to take a shit under your Christmas tree again Bells are ringing, children screaming: "Why's Santa humping the tree?" I guess he snapped and got fed up Bringing gifts that we don't need Here comes Santa Claus Here comes Santa Claus Lost and drunk again He's got a bag that's filled with turds For boys and girls the same Hear those sleigh bells ringle-jingle As he scratches his crotch So jump in bed and cover your head Cause Santa just had some scotch