These are some things I wrestle with as I strive for contentment as an artist.
Can I be honest? Give you transparency?
These are things I battle with as I share and MC
I'm an Indie rapper, in a small market
Admit I saw hardship, fam, it's been a factor
I'm in a different chapter, it used to be, I'd go to shows
All they'd know is I'm the bro of Timothy Brindle after
He put out Great Awakening in 2003 (classic)
I was writing on the low but silent indeed
2004, I started to do concerts and shows
Gradually a small fanbase started to grow
Tim's one of the best to do it, so the standard is high
I wanna be the best I can, at least I plan to try
No, I'm not signed to a label but people assume that I am
Forget the lies and the fables, I'll tell you the truth where I stand
I'm not on Lamp Mode, but love em, and we've done music and jams
I'm truly a fan, of their work, I'm down with the whole crew and the clan
Was never asked to join and so I just started my own (Gametime)
Then Josue took a break and was pausing from shows
You seen me at events? I was probably alone
Then working at my job so much, I hardly was home
No time for jottin the poems, my thoughts would just rome
But never thought all of these struggles would cause me to grow
The label didn't quite pop off, like how I had thought
But I ain't gonna quit, nah, that's not how I was taught
Yea I have supporters but no major co-signs
But that just keeps me hungry, I'm making more rhymes
Tryna battle all these fears, and balance my career
Crying out, even if God is silent He hears
Came in the game underground, and I love that sound
But I like to change it up and be versatile
I know some people wish the music would just stay the same
I'm growing as an artist, but still stay in my lane
I've put out projects, does anybody care
What is the point? Should I continue to share?
Or should I quit? And Throw my stuff in the sewer (or is my stuff manure)
God gave me a gift need to be a good steward
So why you rhyme for Christ? I'll answer why
My Savior, the Creator came as a man and died
I cannot lie, when I analyze the facts
I'll never have the power to cancel out His wrath (40 bars)
Scratches
"These are things I battle with... as I share and MC"
You may have seen at some shows, I was actin all friendly
Little did you know my heart was so sad and it's heavy
On top of that, inside I was battling envy
You want me to explain? Ok I'm actually ready
The practice is deadly I wrestle with contentment
On the microphone, I intend to be impressive
I tend to be aggressive, but then I'm getting jealous
When cats with less skill, get more shine, what are my intentions?
Need to man up, forget extended adolescence
I really need to pray to Him, I'm treasuring His presence
When it's tough, will I delight in the wilderness
Fighting the bitterness, striving with diligence
Asking myself what's my real motivation
Is it to grow and praise Him, and make Him to known to nations
Or am I cool with just having some associations
Am I after His glory, or my own admiration?
The compliments can really boost your confidence
Making you puffed up, before you can acknowledge it
Start loving prominence and trusting accomplishments
We love bein at the top, and covet dominance
What is the consequence? Pride of life and godlessness
Conviction starts to set in, and it bugs our consciouses
Until we stop the sin, repent, and run to providence
If we don't get the glory we feel what despondence is
And feelin down if we don't like how the response has been
We need to stop worrying and trust His promises
As an artist it's easy to fall into temptation
Pride or self-pity are the traps we're often facin
Are people sleeping? Or are people hatin?
They ain't even peepin? I'm needing patience
You love my music? Gives me a great sensation
Oh you don't like it? Now I'm feeling devestation
That's the honest highs and lows of putting out music
Sometimes it feels dope, other times it feels useless
So why do I do this? You really wanna know?
I write for people who're in pain and to offer hope
And if I only reach a few of the people hurtin
I'ma keep on making songs, cause to me it's worth it
And if I only reach a few of the people hurtin
I'ma keep on making songs, cause to me it's worth it
Scratches
"I wrestle with contentment"
"I wrestle with contentment"
"These are things I battle with as I share and MC"