April 27th, 2019
I hope you hear, I hope this reaches you, uh
All the money in the world, I can't find where they sellin' time
Or a button that rewind, I'm just thinkin', sippin' this wine
Let me catch you up
It's been some time, lets me catch you up, yeah, uh, fuck
I don't know where to start
But somethin' told me, "Write this down and just speak from the heart"
It's been 14 years since I found you all alone in the dark
But losin' you brought us together when it could've torn us apart
Mom still ain't good, she misses you, she thinks 'bout you daily
We got a dog after you passed, and she nicknamed her Missy
She lives alone out in New Orleans, she always tells me she miss me
But such is life, this story's real, it's not a movie by Disney
She'll probably tell you I wrote a song and put your story inside it, fuck
I forgot to tell you, I'm like famous rapper now
Signed a record deal, I made all of my dreams come true
I toured the world, made platinums albums, and I still stayed true
It's so much to catch up on now as I think out loud
When you passed, I was fuckin' up, still I was a problem child
But we had promises to each other, yeah, I swore, and I vowed
I went to college, I graduated, I would've made you proud
I'm 'bout to turn 30, James is 'bout to turn 27
He's findin' himself still, but I know he'll find out in a second
He graduated from the same school that I went to in NOLA
He lives right up the street from mom's, it's crazy as he's gotten older
He's matured beyond his years, he's the best I guy I know
I find the older I get, it's like the less that I know
This world's confusin', sometimes I feel all depressed, filled with gloom
The more and more I understand why you had to hide in that room, fuck
It's been some time since I had someone I could tell this shit
Celebrity life is full of everyone expectin' shit
In 2019, life is crazy, and it's evident, wait
You won't believe this part, but Trump was the president
And Leo finally got his Oscar after all
And the Warriors were finally the best team in basketball
Anyways that's all for now, I'll keep it short and sweet
I'll save the rest until the next time we meet, I miss you, Melissa
I found peace
Hope this moment's brief
Shaded memories
I can hardly speak
I found peace (in our dreams)
I just grit my teeth
Through teary eyes, I see
Smilin' back at me
I found peace, I found peace
Yeah, uh
Been seven months since you left
Some nights it hits me harder than others, that's when I get depressed
I play your shit, but I had to stop readin' old texts
I shed tears, sometimes still, fuck it, I've been a mess
Knowin' myself, I was too proud to ever tell this to you
But since you popped out first, I used to be a lil' jealous of you
I used to hate sometimes, Jameel said, "That's not healthy of you"
But I was broke and unsuccessful, what you expect me to do?
See us, two white boys rappin', felt like they would always compare us
Except you sell out shows across the world from Oakland to Paris
And I was still at my mom's crib, that means I live with my parents
I couldn't sell shit out in my town, I was slightly embarrassed
Fast-forward some years, I finally caught up a bit
I always wonder 'bout that time, like if you fucked with my shit
And then we finally met in Europe, playin' festival shows
You watch my set sidestage, I'm tryna flex at them shows
Until I went and watched yours, you burnt that shit down
We talked shit and caught up afterwards, you fucked with my sound
We clicked, immediately, time passed in a blink
Talkin' shit, I can't believe that was the first time we linked
What I was goin' through with Ash', you went through with Ariana
And you would check in on me daily, help me deal with that drama
Come to think of it, we talked like every day last summer
You were like a big brother, crazy that you was younger
It's, only a dream until it happens to you
But no one ever told me these things would be happenin' too, fuck
Anyways that's all for now, I'll keep this short and sweet
I'll save the rest until the next time we meet, I miss you, Mac
I found peace
Hope this moment's brief
Shaded memories
I can hardly speak
I found peace (in our dreams)
I just grit my teeth
Through teary eyes, I see
Smilin' back at me
I found peace, I found peace
All the money in the world, I can't find where they sellin' time
Or a button that rewind, I'm just thinkin', sippin' this wine
Let me catch you up, it's been a while, let me catch you up
Yeah, uh (Scoop Dezel)