It's a god-awful small affair For the girl with the mousy hair And her mommy is yelling, "No!" And her daddy has told her to go But her friend is nowhere to be seen And she walks in a sunken dream To the seat with the clearest view And she's hooked on the silver screen But the film is a saddening bore For she's lived it ten times or more It's about to be lived again As I ask you to focus on Sailors fighting in the dance hall Oh no! Look at those cavemen go! It's the freakiest show Take a look at the lawman Beating on the wrong guy Oh man! Wonder if he'll ever know? He's in the best selling show Is there life on Mars? It's on America's tortured brow Mickey Mouse has grown up a cow And the workers have struck for fame Because Lennon's on sale again See the mice in their million hordes From Ibiza to the Norfolk roads Rule Britannia is out of bounds For my mother, my dog, and clowns But the film is a saddening bore For I wrote it ten times or more It's about to be writ again As I ask you to focus on Sailors fighting in the dance hall Oh no! Look at those cavemen go! It's the freakiest show Take a look at the lawman Beating on the wrong guy Oh man! Wonder if he'll ever know He's in the best selling show Is there life on Mars?