On a humid Queensland summer night under the Southern Cross The diesel train obeys the red light piercing though the fog The drivers rack a line of coke and get to talken dirty The cargo bound for Melbourne Zoo, the time just past three thirty Creatures of all types big and small stolen from the bush Soon they'll be on display for heaps of cunts to have a look Suddenly the Southern Cross seemed to boil in the sky It turned blood red the drivers can't believe their fuckin' eyes Three beams of light blasted down like a rum and coke shit It shook the ground around the train and carried on like a fuckwit The train was hit harder than a Backpacker's pussy on a boat with Alby Mangels The air became dense with the logical smell of triangles An hour passed, the drivers woke and stumbled to their feet All around them, out of the darkness, red eyes and gnashing teeth A quick glance down the train line all the carriages are torn apart The giant shadows rose over them one driver had a fucking shart He turned his head torch on "I knew this run was cursed" Then a sixteen foot tall platypus ate him arsehole first The other driver shit himself and tried to fuckin' run But he found himself pinned to the cab By a nine hundred kilo blue tongue Cheer up cunt fucker we'll let ya live if ya take us to the place Where there's the most cunts in Australia Ok mate, most of us are in Melbourne, that's where we're fucking going Well let's get going or I'll use you To give me mate echidna here a back rub The driver pushed forward though the night He thought he'd lost his mind He top shelved seven No-Dozes (up his arse) and hurtled down the line The train arrived at Flinders Street early in the morning The city of Melbourne was about to Change forever without a fucken warning ♪ People drank their skinny lattes and spoke of emotional pain While the mutant outback animals broke the fuck out of that train A giant wombat ate a lawyer vaping on the corner A flock of cycling hipsters brang a salty to the slaughter The Melbourne streets flowed with blood, the city overrun The outback monsters were diverse, they were eatin' fucking everyone ♪ A twenty foot tall kangaroo put a barista in her pouch Then smashed a window and punched a Feminist writing a blog on her couch The outback military arrived and the war had just begun Orders were given by General Micko "the mad cunt" Maddison The diggers fought their hearts out, many lives were lost But they couldn't pin these fuckers down This was Straya's holocaust Micko "the mad cunt" Maddison got PM Poon on the blower "Davo, we better do something before these fuckers fuck us over" "Fuck mate I reckon we've got a weapon that might just save our town We've had it lying dormant under the Melbourne Fucken Cricket Ground But we need someone to drive it, or Australia will be sorry" "Are you thinkin who I'm thinkin" "Yeah, fuckin' Borry!" Flame Angels got the call "Borry get here quick!" He had a T bone steak and packed up his dick He fanged he truck through the chaos crushing victim's bones He made it there in no time and still punched fifteen cones ♪ The Melbourne Cricket Ground opened up and it rose from its den Borry took one look at it "Fuck me! It's rise of the red claw. Again!" A semi pumped liqud meth into the seventy story high mud crab Borry sat on a milk crate and drank a slab Then he grabbed Gemima and jumped on red claw's back He shot two holes in the crab's thick Shell and anchored with his ball sack Then off they went through the streets, gettin' it fucking done Killing all the outback monsters, all of them but one A sixty foot koala pissed in red claw's mouth Borry's ball bag lost its grip and he tumbled to the ground The koala lined up Borry and went to piss with all its might But then red claw unleashed a giant Crab shit and set the stink bear alight Borry looked up at red claw, "Cheers cunt, go back to Darwin And pop in the mud" Red claw walked into the sunset as the Melbourne people cheered Borry got back in his truck, farted twice and twisted off a long beer The city of Melbourne was rebuilt and the people came together And from that day on, Straya will never forget The sickest cunt ever!