Sir, I do appreciate the offer I don't believe I caught your name I don't get to get out very often It's hard to find the time to get away I think it's only fair you hear my story Before you spend three-fifty on that beer I got two little kids that call me Momma My fifteen-year-old thinks that I'm a witch Between soccer practice and ballet Eminem an' Dr Dre Romance is the last thing on my list So, Frank, was it? Tell me what you think Do you still want to buy me that drink? Frank, tell me, how d'you feel About teenage girls bein' on the pill? An' do you mind Friday nights at home? 'Cause, Frankie, I've been here before Married twice an' twice divorced An' alimony sure don't pay the bills Now that's an awful lot of information But I don't have the time to mess around 'Cause I got two little kids that call me Momma An' my fifteen year old wants to pierce his lip Between algebra an' spellin' bees An' anythin' to keep the peace Romance is the last thing on my list So, Frank, honey, tell me what you think Do you still want to buy me that drink? I got two little kids that call me Momma An' my fifteen-year-old's really a good kid I really wouldn't blame you none If you got the urge to up an' run Is bein' 'Daddy' even on your list? So, Frank, darlin', tell me what you think Do you still want to buy me? I'll have a Miller Lite, please If you still want to buy me that drink Frank, c'mon back Frank You look a little pale, Frank It was just a joke