"And then 4 months down the road the idiot gear kicks in,
And I ask about the ex-boyfriend which,
As we all know is a really dumb move but you know how it is --
You don't want to know, but you just have to know, right?
You know, stupid guy bullshit."
[Louis Logic]
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls:
In this corner quivering in the white trunks
We have the unsuspecting boyfriend facing up to the champion,
His well-seasoned girlfriend.
The three knockdown rule is in full effect
[Verse 1]
Ding Ding
That's the sound of curiousity peaking like cops that pat you down
Boyfriends probably seeking the dirt on the skirt as if he's deep in the earth
Like who had reached in the shirt and who was sleeping with her, but hey --
She's only human and probably only doing the dude who she loves most
So you know who she's screwing
But while you're lying there spooning assuming life is just all good
You indavertently missed the size of the falsehood
Living life in a small hood you probably collide
With lots of the guys who used to climb on top of your wife
So it's not a surprise you're asking the stupidest questions:
'Who was the best in the sack?' and 'How many dudes have you slept with?'
But the chance is, you didn't want them answers
And can't live with it she used to be just a dancer
Making the fast tips you would stuff her pants with
And fast as mass transit she thought you were romantic
[Chorus]
I'm so glad we met (hey shorty)
Come on girl try to be patient, I know I'm a pain in the ass
But your ex-boyfriend has me stressed (back off dude)
And all of the sex stuff should just remain in the past
But we can't get married yet, (no we can't get married yet)
It isn't just that it's greener, it's also the length of the grass
But somehow you keep on running to me -- and we keep living in fear of the idiot gear
[Verse 2]
Right about this time, most of y'all are just wishin that this was fiction
And itchin to ask your chick if your dick isn't a depiction
Of fitting inside a stitching when you're sewing it up
And to think that most of this stuff is just over a fuck
I know what you're thinking, we've all grown up with women
And living without em seems like it's harder than living with em
But if you hit em, you'll probably end up living in prison fellas
Then you'll be someone's bitch -- I hope your girlfriend isn't jealous
This cinderella shit is totally irrelevant
You'll never get a girl older than 7 that's been celibate
Cause every chick has been around the block with a guy or ten
And guys are sensitive, it's better that you lie to them
Even the violent men who's dressed up in street clothes
With stilettos and heat knows they got delicate egos
If she chose to tell you all persons with whom
She put in work in the room, it would burst your balloon
[Chorus]
[Verse 3]
Looking at your sweetest snapshot, that's when you start to wonder
About the backdrop of her other lovers
When you discover another flick of her hidden up under there
Dressed in summer wear, with her ex giving her bunny ears
And no one wants to share their chick with last guy
To get rid of the bad vibes you figured you ask why
Her past life is still chilling in the picture frame
She'd probably forget his name if the dick's the same
Which is lame, but for some dumb reason
The last bum seeps into your dreams and you become unseasoned
Then one evening, you build up the heart to ask her
Disaster -- with your lungs breathin hard as asthma
And after she breaks down and tells you the truth
It leads to a fight and she's yelling at you
And I'm convinced of this: being your queen's only king
Yo man see Louis right -- ignorance is bliss
[Chorus]
Oh what's a guy to do
Now listen to me papi
You're all fucking idiots
How do you like them apples?
"You know what I don't think we need to do the thing
Where we tell each other everything ..."