Winter winds, how you crawl across the lake While you tease and scream my name Speaking softly in grey, hold me up, just hold me up Shifting back and forth from listening to hearing It's hard to know when you ache, between wanting and needing And I just can't control myself Cycle and circle and break the seal again It's hard to admit it, I'm a shell of a man Let me see with color, clarity from the mother And I just want to live, like I have worth to give Filled with golden blood... Is this what I've given, will I live to see a son I won't follow my father, I'm not the foolish one Naïve as a child, I look for the Gods in the stars I stay silent and listen for lost ones I'm not the foolish one We deny it, drowning our souls The haunting quiet, this cold black storm And I choose to live, and I want to make a home In this shame I create, my mouth spews black ash and foam