I've been in the fish tank all week You've been peering in at me Showing off your accolades Showing off your pretty teeth Felt this sense of fuzziness This sense I don't belong This sense that everything I've done Has been so bad and wrong Feeling like a frantic kid Who still fully believes in magic Bookmaking manifestation Checking spam notifications When does the fog lift? When does the trick end? When do I stop feeling freakish in a room full of my closest friends? When does the noise stop? When do my eyes close? When does the shoe drop? When do I get home? Growing out my fingernails Biting back my teeth I rid myself of all awareness It's all keratin to me Remembering how warm I felt Curled up next to him And how I didn't hate myself The way I told myself I did When does the fog lift? When does the trick end? When do I stop feeling freakish in a room full of my closest friends? When does the noise stop? When do my eyes close? When does the shoe drop? When do I get home?