It's her first time coming round
And i'm getting ready for it now
With a little bit of lynx just so i can set the mood
I'm nervous cause we've never met
But you can tell it's on from the flirts in our texts
Then i'm surprised, on what happens next
Cause she opens the door with a six pack of becks
And some vodka, and a glass
So i drink and i drink 'till i fall on my arse
And we're both pissed, having good times
Start touching her hand and she starts touching mine
And it's all cool cause we started kissin'
But i could just tell that there's something missing
And i'm shocked at what happens next
I couldn't get it up and now i'm so vexed
What a nightmare
I must've chugged bare
Too much in my cup
Cause i can't get it up
I just can't get it up
What a nightmare
I must've chugged bare
Too much in my cup
Cause i can't get it up
I just can't get it up
Now i'm sat on the edge of my bed, i feel sick
She thinks it's her so she calls me a prick
And get's up and leaves quick
Slamming the door, it's already fucked i might as well drink more
Chances slim, mood is dim
I don't care anyway i think she's grim
Well i don't, i mean i'm just saying that
So i can try and make myself feel like less of a twat
Fucks sake, can this night get shitter?
Turns out it can as i open my twitter
Scroll through my phone and what do i see?
She's only gone and wrote a tweet about me
Oh jeeze, can't believe i've been exposed
I've fucked up big time and everybody knows
I really hope to god that it doesn't go viral
I'm never ever drinking again, that's final
What a nightmare
I must've chugged bare
Too much in my cup
Cause i can't get it up
I just can't get it up
What a nightmare
I must've chugged bare
Too much in my cup
Cause i can't get it up
I just can't get it up
Rooms spinning i'm laying in my bed
I'm such an idiot i should've just said
I was trying the best that i can
But none of this shit ever goes to plan
Rooms spinning i'm laying in my bed
I'm such an idiot i should've just said
I was trying the best that i can
But none of this shit ever goes to plan
Rooms spinning i'm laying in my bed
I'm such an idiot i should've just said
I was trying the best that i can
But none of this shit ever goes to plan
What a nightmare
I must've chugged bare
Too much in my cup
Cause i can't get it up
I just can't get it up
What a nightmare
I must've chugged bare
Too much in my cup
Cause i can't get it up
I just can't get it up