I'm a decent boy just landed from the town of Ballyfad I want a situation, yes, and wants it very bad I seen employment advertised - "It's just the thing," says I But the dirty spalpeen ended with 'No Irish Need Apply' "Woah," says I, "but thats an insult, though to get the place I'll try" So I went to see the blaggard with his 'No Irish Need Apply' Some may think it a misfortune to be christened Pat or Dan But to me it is an honor to be born an Irishman I started out to find the house, I got it mighty soon There I found the old chap seated, he was reading the Tribune I told him what I came for, when he in a rage did fly "No!" he says, "you are a Paddy, and no Irish need apply" Well I gets my dander risin', I'd like to black his eye To tell an Irish gentleman, 'No Irish Need Apply' Some may think it a misfortune to be christened Pat or Dan But to me it is an honor to be born an Irishman Well I couldnt stand it longer, so ahold of him I took And I gave him such a whelping as he'd get at Donnybrook He hollered "Milia murther," and to get away did try And swore he'd never write again 'No Irish Need Apply' Well he makes a big apology, I bid him then good-bye Saying "when next you want a beating, write 'No Irish Need Apply'" Some may think it a misfortune to be christened Pat or Dan But to me it is an honor to be born an Irishman