Oh my wife is tall and short, She won't do what she ought. She never lies, but then again, She lies down all day long. Oh My wife is fat and thin, She's generous and mean, She's –––––, and Her secret's safe with me. Oh My wife is old and young So sweet with her poison tongue On her evenings off she blackmails toffs, But her secret's safe with me. Oh My wife is tall and short, She hangs out down the port, Says "Hello sailor, how's your dad?" But her secret's safe with me. Oh My wife is sour and sweet, She dit dit dit delete, She's lalala ladida, butter Secret's safe with me.