TOM JONES Miscellaneous Ballad Of Tom Jones What did I do wrong? Oh you nearly drove me cuckoo Am I really all that bad? You're worse than Hannibal Lechter, Charlie Manson, Freddie Krueger Why are we still together? Oh I can't leave until you're dead You mean 'til death do us part? I mean like cyanide, strangulation or an axe to your head It was lucky for us I turned the radio on They say that music soothes the savage beast There was something in that voice that stopped us seeing red The two of us would surely have ended up dead [Chorus] You stopped us from killing each other Tom Jones, Tom Jones You'll never know but you saved our lives Tom Jones, Tom Jones I could never throw my knickers at you And I don't come from Wales So haven't solved our problems You mean we hate each others guts I still wanna poison your pizza And I still wanna cut off your nuts I phoned the marriage guidance I tied the phone line round your neck I'm sick of all this hatred Well that will be the arsenic making you sick You were about to drive me over the edge of a cliff As I tried to jump out I knocked the stereo on You changed your mind and then slammed on the brakes It was lucky for us we bought his greatest hits [Repeat Chorus] And now the war is over I've lost the urge to break your neck I owe my life to What's New Pussycat Delilah stopped me hating you and wishing you dead Oh I used to call you satan And you were Cruella De'Ville And now you call me your Delilah And I am not your lucifer And I am just your pussycat But just a word of warning now Just in case we ever get tured of his voice I know the Mafia, Godzilla, King Kong And I know an atom that's bomb going for a song [Repeat Chorus Twice]