There's a place you may have heard of
It's a tale we like to tell
When folks whose code ain't up to code
Well they go to Android Hell
Now the devil is found deep underground
So, any faith will yell (so deep below)
Well Aperture happens to be ten miles down
Half-way to Android Hell
So when those lemons that life gives you
Just combust to dust and fumes
Buddy, life may give you lemons
But we got oranges and blues
Oh they gave us cores emotions
But that doesn't gel at all
Because all I feel's repulsion
And I'm bouncing off the walls
And each chamber full of dangers that we force upon a stranger
To test their feeble brains or brawn
Is nothing to the test if whether rust or boredom gets us
What's it matter what side of the glass we're on?
So may your management-rail guide you
To a better place some day
Although technically they're omni-directional
We know they all just lead one way!
So be you core, bot, cube or turret (because we can)
Treat this Aperture factory well
'Cos there's a worse fate awaitin' as your
Soul's emancipated by the grills of Android Hell (because we can)
Now my baby, she up and left me
Told me I was just a square (oh no)
I said, darlin' we're both spherical
She said she wasn't programmed to care! (Not programmed to care)
Oh yes, the life down here's a hard one (so hard)
Not just because of acid-lakes! (Oh those acid lakes)
Since my first day, had about a thousand birthdays
I still ain't seen no cake!
Yes it's a hard life lived for that hard-light bridge
To that rail-track in the sky!
But there's no mistaking, it's a fall you will be taking
Cake is not this place's only lie!
So when the floor gives way to ceiling (floor gives way to ceiling)
But your back is against the wall (against the wall)
In a loop that keeps repeating
Who can say how far you'll fall?
Now you've heard tell of Android Hell
But you've got naught to fear
We all live in her chambers
We're all already here